{"id":1701,"date":"2010-08-26T11:09:46","date_gmt":"2010-08-26T15:09:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/kainatamektup.com\/?p=1701"},"modified":"2014-03-17T17:51:33","modified_gmt":"2014-03-17T21:51:33","slug":"kirk-1-bolum","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/kainatamektup.com\/index.php\/2010\/08\/kirk-1-bolum\/","title":{"rendered":"K\u0131rk – 1. B\u00f6l\u00fcm –"},"content":{"rendered":"![\"babil_kulesi_k\u0131rk\u0131nc\u0131kat\"](https:\/\/kainatamektup.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/08\/babil_kulesi_k\u0131rk\u0131nc\u0131kat-239x300.jpg\" "\\"babil_kulesi_k\u0131rk\u0131nc\u0131kat\\"")
Babil Kulesi’ni and\u0131ran plazan\u0131n k\u0131rk\u0131nc\u0131 kat\u0131na \u00e7\u0131karken y\u00fckselen kariyerini d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc. Hi\u00e7bir zaman asans\u00f6r gibi t\u0131rman\u0131lamayan kariyer \u00e7izgisi k\u0131r\u0131lmalarla olu\u015fmu\u015f sin\u00fcs e\u011frisi gibiydi. X ve Y koordinatlar\u0131 aras\u0131nda borsa grafi\u011fini and\u0131ran hayat \u00e7izgisi hangi varolu\u015f kayg\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 i\u00e7inde sakl\u0131yordu. Asans\u00f6r i\u015f yerinin bulundu\u011fu k\u0131rk\u0131nc\u0131 kata geldi\u011finde kap\u0131 a\u00e7\u0131ld\u0131 ve birden kendine geldi. \u201cNe varolu\u015fu?\u201d dedi kendi kendine, o anda asans\u00f6re bir daha yaln\u0131z binmemeyi akl\u0131ndan ge\u00e7irdi. Yaln\u0131z kald\u0131\u011f\u0131nda sanki birileri onu s\u0131k\u0131\u015ft\u0131r\u0131yor, d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmek istemedi\u011fi konular\u0131 kula\u011f\u0131na f\u0131s\u0131ld\u0131yordu. D\u0131\u015far\u0131dan bakan birisini imrendirecek kadar g\u00fczel bir hayat\u0131 vard\u0131. O da hayat\u0131n\u0131 d\u0131\u015f kabu\u011fu ile de\u011ferlendirmeliydi, gereksiz detaylar\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnerek ak\u0131p giden zaman\u0131n seyrini bozmamal\u0131yd\u0131.<\/p>\n
\u00dc\u00e7 y\u00fcz k\u0131rk yedi numaral\u0131 odas\u0131na ge\u00e7erken etraf\u0131 g\u00f6z ucuyla selamlad\u0131. Zaten asans\u00f6r kap\u0131s\u0131n\u0131n kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131na oturmu\u015f kurum sekreterini g\u00f6rmemek ho\u015f kar\u015f\u0131lanacak durum de\u011fildi. Nedense \u015firketlerde o kadronun kar\u015f\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131 \u015f\u0131k ve \u015fuh bir bayand\u0131r. \u201cPrezentab\u0131l\u201d m\u0131 yaz\u0131l\u0131yor kelime diye d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc. Esnek \u00e7al\u0131\u015fma temposu, giyimine \u00f6zen g\u00f6steren\u2026 diye ba\u015flayan yalanlar… O makama gelen ki\u015finin giyinmeye mi yoksa giyinmemeye mi \u00f6zen g\u00f6stermesi gereklidir? Vizyonlu ve misyonlu c\u00fcmleler aras\u0131nda s\u0131k\u0131\u015fm\u0131\u015f \u00e7al\u0131\u015fma hayat\u0131 derken sanki dudaklar\u0131 k\u0131p\u0131rdad\u0131. \u00d6zel kalem m\u00fcd\u00fcr\u00fc kendine bir \u015fey s\u00f6ylendi\u011fini zannederek irkildi. Ne kadar zorlanm\u0131\u015ft\u0131 erkek bir \u00f6zel kalem m\u00fcd\u00fcr\u00fcn\u00fc i\u015fe alabilmek i\u00e7in, b\u00fct\u00fcn kuruma bunu anlatabilmek bir hayli zaman alm\u0131\u015ft\u0131. Di\u011fer y\u00f6neticiler bu durumu hala kabullenememi\u015fti, fakat konumu gere\u011fi \u015fimdilik ona di\u015f bat\u0131racak durumda de\u011fillerdi.
\nMasas\u0131na oturdu\u011funda i\u015f yerine giri\u015fi s\u0131ras\u0131nda yoruldu\u011funu hissetti. \u201cBir daha asans\u00f6re tek ba\u015f\u0131ma binmemeliyim.\u201d dedi. \u00d6zel kalem m\u00fcd\u00fcr\u00fcne kendisini a\u015fa\u011f\u0131da kar\u015f\u0131lamas\u0131n\u0131 s\u00f6ylese \u00e7ok mu garip ka\u00e7ard\u0131. \u201cBir de kendini farkl\u0131 biri gibi g\u00f6steriyor, \u015fu egoya bak kendini d\u0131\u015f kap\u0131da kar\u015f\u0131lat\u0131yor.\u201d c\u00fcmlesini t\u00fcm \u00e7al\u0131\u015fanlar m\u0131 yoksa bir k\u0131sm\u0131 m\u0131 kurabilir diye akl\u0131ndan ge\u00e7irdi.<\/p>\n
Hep bulundu\u011fu zamana ve mekana yabanc\u0131 gibi ya\u015fad\u0131. \u00d6\u011frencilik y\u0131llar\u0131nda kantinde otururken de, staj zaman\u0131nda bindi\u011fi i\u015f\u00e7i servisinde de ba\u015fka biriydi. Servis otob\u00fcs\u00fcnde i\u015f\u00e7iler dizi, futbol, politika, ge\u00e7im muhabbeti yaparken bir k\u0131sm\u0131 da uyurdu. O g\u00fcnler de yan\u0131nda gizlice ta\u015f\u0131d\u0131\u011f\u0131 dergi veya kitab\u0131 okudu\u011funu hat\u0131rlad\u0131. \u0130\u015f\u00e7i haklar\u0131n\u0131 savunan bir k\u00f6\u015fe yaz\u0131s\u0131 okudu\u011funda orada i\u015f\u00e7ilerin \u00fczerinde gizlice g\u00f6zlerini gezdirir, bu yazar\u0131n ger\u00e7ek anlamda bir i\u015f\u00e7i tan\u0131d\u0131\u011f\u0131 var m\u0131 diye d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcrd\u00fc. Nedense y\u00fcr\u00fcy\u00fc\u015f yapacak i\u015f\u00e7iler aras\u0131nda bu ger\u00e7ek i\u015f\u00e7ilerden hi\u00e7 g\u00f6r\u00fclmezdi. Olacaksan devlet i\u015f\u00e7isi olacaks\u0131n ki y\u00fcr\u00fcmeye g\u00fcc\u00fcn ve zaman\u0131n olsun. \u201cYa da sendika y\u00f6neticisi olacaks\u0131n. G\u00fczel kamplar, dolgun maa\u015flar\u2026\u201d Bizim otob\u00fcste i\u015f\u00e7iler aras\u0131nda bir anket yap\u0131lsa k\u00f6y ve akraba ziyareti hari\u00e7 tatil yapan \u00e7\u0131kma ihtimali olas\u0131l\u0131k hesaplar\u0131na g\u00f6re s\u0131f\u0131ra yak\u0131nd\u0131r. S\u0131f\u0131ra yak\u0131n olmak, hi\u00e7 olmak m\u0131d\u0131r?<\/p>\n
Telefonlar, toplant\u0131lar, seminerler, bitirilmesi gereken i\u015fler, bitmeyen i\u015fler, yar\u0131m kalan g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015fmeler, ba\u011flant\u0131 yap\u0131lan b\u00fcy\u00fck i\u015fler, ka\u00e7an b\u00fcy\u00fck bal\u0131klar, kartvizitler aras\u0131nda dola\u015fmalar\u2026 kartvizit dedi\u011finde akl\u0131na ince bir fikir geldi. Kartvizitli\u011fin her sayfas\u0131n\u0131n k\u00f6\u015fesine bir dostun ismini yazsak unutulmaya terk edilmi\u015f dostluklar hat\u0131ra gelir mi? Ayr\u0131ca emrimdeki \u00e7al\u0131\u015fanlara ayn\u0131 \u015feyi yapmalar\u0131n\u0131 telkin etsem, haydi arkada\u015flar \u015fimdi on be\u015f dakika \u00e7ay ve dostluk molas\u0131.<\/p>\n
Bug\u00fcn anla\u015f\u0131lan d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnme g\u00fcn\u00fc, i\u015f yo\u011funlu\u011fu aras\u0131nda bile akl\u0131ma garip fikirler gelebiliyor. Acaba patrondan izin mi istesem dedi kendi kendine. Konu\u015facak dost bulamad\u0131\u011f\u0131nda i\u015fte b\u00f6yle kendi kendine konu\u015furdu. Bu durumdaki ki\u015fi birilerine g\u00f6re klinik hasta olabilir; fakat durumu kontrol edebildi\u011fi i\u00e7in kimse kendisine \u00f6nden elbise giydirip \u00f6zel ara\u00e7la g\u00f6t\u00fcrmeye yeltenmiyor. Bir g\u00fcn kendimi kontrol edemeyebilirim dedi ve bir an irkildi. \u0130rkildi\u011fimizde fark\u0131na varabilir miyiz?
\nHafif\u00e7e salland\u0131\u011f\u0131 koltu\u011fundan ani bir hareketle do\u011fruldu ve h\u0131zl\u0131 ad\u0131mlarla y\u00fcr\u00fcmeye ba\u015flad\u0131. \u00d6nce \u00f6zel kalem m\u00fcd\u00fcr\u00fc kem k\u00fcmler aras\u0131nda arkas\u0131ndan bakakald\u0131, ard\u0131ndan g\u00f6r\u00fclmeyi bekleyen kurum sekreteri.<\/p>\n
Asans\u00f6r h\u0131zl\u0131ca a\u015fa\u011f\u0131ya inerken yine yaln\u0131z oldu\u011funu fark etti. Her \u00e7\u0131k\u0131\u015f\u0131n bir ini\u015fi vard\u0131r; insanlar, aileler, \u015fehirler, devletler, k\u0131talar, d\u00fcnya, kainat… Ba\u015far\u0131 nedir? Ba\u015far\u0131s\u0131zl\u0131k ne? Her d\u00fc\u015f\u00fc\u015f ba\u015far\u0131s\u0131zl\u0131k m\u0131? Ya\u015fl\u0131 bir adam g\u00fc\u00e7ten kuvvetten d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcp aciz kald\u0131\u011f\u0131nda ba\u015far\u0131s\u0131z m\u0131 olmu\u015ftur; yoksa bu bir hakikat gere\u011fi midir?<\/p>\n
\u00d6nce cep telefonunu kapatt\u0131. Arac\u0131na bindi\u011finde \u015fehirden aceleyle uzakla\u015fmak istedi\u011fini fark etti. Hen\u00fcz toy bir delikanl\u0131 iken ilk terk etti\u011fi i\u015fi akl\u0131na geldi. G\u00f6zlerinden s\u00fcz\u00fclen damlac\u0131klarla ne kadar \u00e7ok y\u00fcr\u00fcm\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc. \u015eimdi bir otomobili oldu\u011fu i\u00e7in \u00fcz\u00fcld\u00fc, arac\u0131 olmasa zorunlu olarak y\u00fcr\u00fcyecekti. \u201c\u0130\u015fini b\u0131rakm\u0131\u015f biri y\u00fcr\u00fcmek d\u0131\u015f\u0131nda bir \u015fey yapamaz.\u201d Terk etmenin en g\u00fczel yolu y\u00fcr\u00fcmektir. Hatta a\u011f\u0131r ad\u0131mlarla d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcne d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcne. A\u011f\u0131r ad\u0131mlarla d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcne d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcne y\u00fcr\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm\u00fczde d\u00fczelecek mi?
\nM\u00fczi\u011fin ritmi artt\u0131k\u00e7a ara\u00e7ta h\u0131zlan\u0131yordu. Bence ritimli m\u00fczik ile ara\u00e7 kullanmak iyi bir tercih de\u011fil. M\u00fczi\u011fin ritmi artt\u0131k\u00e7a ara\u00e7 h\u0131zland\u0131. Ara\u00e7 h\u0131zland\u0131k\u00e7a m\u00fczi\u011fin ritmi artt\u0131. Nereye gidece\u011fini bilmedi\u011fi i\u00e7in sonunda kendini araca ve yola teslim ederek kainat\u0131n ritme ayak uydurdu. H\u0131zlanarak ka\u00e7abilir miyiz?<\/p>\n
Art\u0131k hi\u00e7bir \u015feyi de\u011fi\u015ftiremeyece\u011fini biliyordu. Sadece kainat\u0131n ritmini duyacak ve ona g\u00f6re hareket edecekti. \u015eehrin son evini ge\u00e7ti\u011finde yava\u015flad\u0131 ve durdu. H\u0131zl\u0131 hareketlerle ara\u00e7tan indi ve sadece dinledi. Ne kadar geni\u015f bir alan, ufuk \u00e7izgisi hafif bulutlu, sar\u0131 \u00e7i\u00e7eklerle \u015fenlenmi\u015f k\u0131rlar, ba\u015fak tutmu\u015f tarlalar, ke\u00e7i ve koyun s\u00fcr\u00fcleri. Bir bu\u011fday tanesine pike yapan ismini bilmedi\u011fi ku\u015f. Tan\u0131\u015famad\u0131\u011f\u0131n bir ku\u015f ne anlat\u0131r?<\/p>\n
Ufukta \u00f6nce bir minare sonra da\u011fa yaslanm\u0131\u015f k\u00f6y\u00fc fark etti. Muhtemelen ileride k\u00f6y\u00fcn anayol ba\u011flant\u0131s\u0131 olmal\u0131yd\u0131. Anayollarda h\u0131zl\u0131ca giderken fark edemedi\u011fimiz y\u00fczlerce k\u00f6y tabelas\u0131ndan biri \u00f6n\u00fcnde duruyordu. H\u0131zl\u0131ca giderken fark edemediklerimiz diye d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc ve o anda kendisi de fark edemedi.<\/p>\n
ikinci b\u00f6l\u00fcm<\/a>
\n\u00fc\u00e7\u00fcnc\u00fc b\u00f6l\u00fcm<\/a><\/p>\nmatbu : kurtuba dergisi’nin 5.say\u0131s\u0131<\/a>nda yay\u0131nlanm\u0131\u015ft\u0131r.
\nsanal : sayha dergi’de yay\u0131nlanm\u0131\u015ft\u0131r.<\/a>\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3679,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[130,217,42],"tags":[6],"class_list":["post-1701","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-hayat-hikaye","category-kirk","category-yol-hikayeleri","tag-cihad-meric"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/kainatamektup.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1701","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/kainatamektup.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/kainatamektup.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kainatamektup.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kainatamektup.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1701"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/kainatamektup.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1701\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3816,"href":"https:\/\/kainatamektup.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1701\/revisions\/3816"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kainatamektup.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3679"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/kainatamektup.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1701"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kainatamektup.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1701"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kainatamektup.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1701"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}